Q: What's the difference between a Simpson juror and an [ISP]  employee? 
A: The Simpson jurors only made *one* incredibly stupid mistake. 

Q:   How many [ISP]  employees does it take to change a lightbulb? 
A:   When we upgrade the T3 hub with a modulating power source to access the main grid from the NASA downlink with a turkey baster mainframed to an ATARI 2600 routed through the Turkish embassy (where the tech department gets its hashish) and overflow the busy signals into a 300 baud modem, we will then have the capability to offer our customers the lightbulb feature.

Q: What's the difference between a proctologist and an [ISP]  customer trying to get honest answers from [ISP]  employees? 
A: A proctologist only has to deal with one asshole at a time.

Q: What's the difference between [ISP]  and the Zzzzbest Carpet Company? 
A: About 10 years. 

Q:   How do you tell which child at the playground belongs to someone who works at [ISP] ? 
A:   They're the one watching the other kids play.

Q:   How many [ISP]  employees does it take to change a lightbulb? (Part 2) 
A:   To change a lightbulb, press 2. To leave a message for the lightbulb, press 3. To find out what the current status of the lightbulb is, press 4.  To find out about our exciting new pricing plans for customers who don't know any better, press 5.

Q:   What did the [ISP]  employee say when he was in line at the U.S. Post office? 
A:   Hey - how come you guys work so fast here? 

Q: How can you tell which [ISP]  employee has just been recently hired? 
A: They mistakenly answer the phone and try to help a customer.

Q:  How do you tell which [ISP]  employee has the greatest seniority? 
A:  They have the most elaborate cobwebs. 

2 guys who work at [ISP]  are sitting at a sidewalk cafe when a sexy woman walks by in a short skirt. 
"Man," says one of them, "I sure would like to screw her." 
"Out of what?" the other asks.